Tuesday, December 22, 2015

My Star Wars Review


Well, I finally (fifth day of release but an eternity in the life of this movie) took the boys to see Star Wars The Force Awakens. Now, I wanted to see it, but I'm not a fan in the root word "fanatic" sense. That ended for me years ago.

Here's what I thought the movie had going for it:
  1. George Lucas isn't at the helm. Star Wars 1-3 were really bad movies. Add to that the fact that George Lucas has deemed it necessary to make the original Star Wars, Empire, and Jedi movies unavailable in Blu-Ray. He's more than happy to sell you the version where he replaced all the special effects, but you can't get the original three movies in a decent resolution. That's a really dick thing to do.
  2. J. J. Abrams is at the helm. Abrams worked magic when he took on the Star Trek universe.
  3. Everyone now hates movies 1-3 (I always hated them) so whoever makes the new movies will stay away from the sins of those movies.
I'm trying to avoid spoilers, but it's hard to talk about some of what I don't like without revealing some plot. Anyway, this is the stuff I didn't like about the movie. Which I guess is a kind of spoiler  in itself since I might be poisoning your well with my attitude if you haven't seen the film yet.


The Pacing Of The Film
Leaving the theatre, one of my sons asked what my favorite part of the movie was. I had to think a minute, but my favorite part was our introduction to Rey as she scavenges the wreckage of a Star Destroyer. This part of the film stood out as a moment where the film didn't seem to rush everything. Except for this moment, the film's story seemed to unfold at breakneck speed for most of the two hour running time.

Take for instance, when Rey flies over a green planet and remarks in amazement, "I didn't know there was this much green in the entire galaxy" or something like that. She's from a desert planet. When she lands she's so amazed with how green everything is that she takes exactly zero minutes to take it all in. She's standing for the first time in her life in a very green forest in front of a very large lake. What could have been a nice moment to slow this movie down for a minute (think Maximus walking through imaginary wheat before a battle) doesn't materialize. The story moves along.

Another example of the film's hectic pacing is the glossing over of Finn's motivation for leaving. We never really explore that. In the beginning, he seems horrified to see a comrade die, but then spends the rest of the movie killing them almost with relish. There is a gold mine of motivation and conflict there to explore, but for the sake of the story moving along, we simplify his story considerably.

Perhaps the most egregious assault on the pacing of this film is evident as Finn and Po are reunited  mid-film and greet each other as old friends. All the hugging and back slapping rings a little hollow when you think back on the fact that this "enduring friendship" is based on three minutes of screen time they spent with their backs to one another in a TIE Fighter. It's also a friendship born from each of them needing the other to do something for them. So their friendship is actually based on fulfilling their own needs. But isn't friendship about putting someone else's needs ahead of yours?

The Force Isn't What It Used To Be
There's a moment in the movie, when our bad guy is interrogating our heroine. He's using his Dark Side powers to enter her head and probe her thoughts, but this seems to also allow her to enter his head. I wanted her to turn the tables on him, take control of the conversation, and enter his mind. What a missed opportunity for her to uncover some of his inner conflict, his story, his desires. For a moment it looked like this is where we were heading, and then the scene abruptly ended.

At another moment, our bad guy basically throws a tantrum. I don't think that needs any explanation as to why that's totally unacceptable for me. I mean, he threw a TANTRUM! After slashing away with his lightsaber at the circuits and computers in front of him, I would have given $100 if the film had cut to an exterior of the Star Destroyer with it's left turn signal stuck with the blinker on.

Thirty Years Isn't That Long
Apparently in thirty years, the defeated Empire has risen from the ashes and has built a new Death Star that's twenty times larger than the old one. All of this was done without anyone noticing I guess.

And everyone speaks of Skywalker and Solo and the rebellion as if it was myth. Do you go from freeing the galaxy from evil to everyone not being sure if it really happened in the very short span of thirty years? Wouldn't there be people around who would say, "Yeah, that happened, I remember seeing it on the news."

J. J. Abrams Traded In His Lens Flares
When J. J. Abrams reinvented the Star Trek universe (a favorite movie of mine,) he had lens flares in just about every shot. Lens flares are that spot or spots that occur when a light shines into the camera lens. It's usually something you avoid, but Abrams added them with computers. I might be reading purpose into something that had none (maybe he did it just because it looked cool,) but I think the lens flares remind you of the camera, thus making you think that what's on screen actually happened and was filmed. This is particularly handy when you are showing things that aren't possible. It adds a realism to the whole movie.

Now, in The Force Awakens, Abrams has replaced lens flares with people running and walking in every direction; like ping pong balls bouncing off of everything and heading in all directions. They're not in every shot like the lens flares in Star Trek, but they're prevalent enough that I noticed it about halfway through the film. I guess it's a side effect of him wanting to have actual people in the movie instead of computer generated ones.




Rey Runs
In almost every scene, Rey is running. She runs this way. She runs that way. Lots of running. Did I mention that she is always running?

I Don't Like Touchdown Dances
Without giving anything away, Finn does a verbal touchdown dance at one point. I respond very negatively to that. It turned me off to him like a cold bucket of water being thrown on me.



Snape Is The Bad Guy
For some reason, the bad guy in this looks exactly like Alan Rickman as Snape. Even my sons noticed. What's the point in that? And was I the only one that thought Leia and her new hairdo gave her head a shape that made her look like the cantina owner Maz Kanata?

A Forty Foot Tall Supreme Leader
If it's a hologram, you can make it any size you want. Why would you make it forty feet tall. Even if he is forty feet tall, you can make it smaller so you don't hurt your neck looking up. Totally impractical.


What I Liked
Now, there was stuff about the film that I liked. I actually liked Daisy Ridley (pictured above.) I thought she did really well. As a matter of fact, she was the only one that I thought did well. Even Harrison Ford seemed to be struggling with his acting, and Carrie Fisher seemed to be destined to stand still and say nothing for the entire film. I guess that was a step up from her role in the original movies where she had to deliver lines like: "The ion cannon will fire several shots to make sure any enemy ships will be out of your flight path.The Po character was too happy, even when being tortured, and the Finn character had the whole touchdown dance thing that I hate.

As I mentioned above, I really liked the sequence in the wrecked Star Destroyer.

When I was younger I loved the original movies. As I grew older, I started to see them a little more objectively, and some of their shine was lost. Like I said in the beginning, I'm not a Star Wars fanatic. Clearly this movie was made with a very keen eye on making the Star Wars fans happy. I can respect that. J. J. Abrams would have been stupid to ignore that need, and that Disney wouldn't have let him ignore it if he had tried.

This movie is a success, and I'm firmly in the minority. $248 million in the first six days. So, I'm clear that I'm the a**hole here.

5 comments:

  1. I won't get into refuting any of your points here, because it ultimately boils down to: "It was aweeeesome." I liked it. You did not, and that's fine.

    I just really wanted to say that I am impressed you had it in you to be this critical of the film upon first viewing, as I was just so excited to take it all in, I was not thinking in terms of good or bad. That's more of a critique of me than you. Maybe upon second viewing, I can see it in a more rational light, rather than just, "Oh, cool. There's the Millennium Falcon!"

    Personally, it was redemptive for me after the prequels, and I thought it was as good of a Star Wars movie as could be made. They've always been pulpy Saturday morning cliffhanger type films, and this one fits in the canon just fine.

    The only "critical" things I thought the whole time were, "Why do the Stormtroopers go to all the trouble of putting on all that armor when a blaster goes right through it immediately?" and "How come BB-8 doesn't get sand in his head when rolling through the desert?" Both pretty minor qualms. Otherwise, I loved every second.


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  3. I liked that the Stormtroopers had some skills. They shot well, moved as infantry squads do, and they used cover when able to. The old movies always upset me when someone stood in front of an object to shoot when they could have shot from behind it.

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  4. Okay, as promised...

    PACING: I agree about the pacing, but this is pretty standard for Star Wars. In the original, Luke grieved more for Obi Wan, who he knew for like fifteen minutes, than he did for his aunt and uncle who raised him. There's no excusing it, but it doesn't kill the enjoyment, at least not for me.

    LENS FLARES: If I had to guess, the lens flares in the Star Trek movies was meant to reflect the shiny happy future envisioned by Roddenberry. Star Wars is a more dirty, lived in universe. Lens flares have no more place here than they do in the Aliens movies.

    RUNNING: You got a problem with women running?

    ACTING: Fisher was wooden, no argument there. I thought Ford was excellent though. He pretty much anchored the whole thing.

    SUPREME LEADER: The CGI on that guy was horrible, but I'm guessing it's going to turn out to be a Wizard of Oz kind of thing, all smoke and mirrors to impress the emerald citizens.

    THIRTY YEARS/SNAPE/LOTS OF OTHER STUFF: A lot of the back story is addressed in the books and comics which Disney has said all counts. But even if it wasn't, I think most audiences (except for a lot of critics and a few old film students) are coming to accept that movies like Star Wars, Man Of Steel, Avengers, etc. are not intended as standalone films. Missing some back story, no problem, it'll show up in later movies. Your fave Jupiter Ascending may have to address everything at once, but Star Wars has plenty of time to get to stuff eventually. It's feature films as serialized entertainment.

    That's one of the main reasons I disagree with you about Rey and Kylo Ren (and the rest of the new faces). I think they are intentionally half-formed as what we are seeing here is their beginnings. They're kids who don't know what the hell they're doing yet. In fact, I would have actually been disappointed if Rey and Kylo had managed a full-on super-hero fight instead of fumbling around with their powers the way they did. It makes perfect sense for Kylo Ren to be throwing tantrums precisely because he's not Darth Vader, just some self-absorbed rebellious woe-is-me teenager pretending to be. Hopefully you'll avoid such things in your life, but to many of us parents in the audience, Ren's behavior was all too familiar and realistic.

    And THANK YOU for not complaining about the similar structure between this and the first Star Wars. That was absolutely necessary and would require a whole post of its own to defend.

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  5. I personally don't like watching such movies. But, your review made me think of it. I will do give a try to it and see what points of your's i agree with..

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