Someone copied me on an e-mail that had a tag at the bottom which read:To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
So I thought, "Why not try that for a few more job titles?" So, write your own joke using your own profession as a starting point. I'll get things rolling in the comments.
To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the firefighter, the supply officer who ordered the damn thing deserves a to be put into a burning building with inferior equipment that only works half of the time all because it was the lowest bid. What? You only want half of the fire put out?
ReplyDeleteTo the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. To the graphic designer, no one has an opinion about the design of the glass until it's completed. Then, everyone becomes a seasoned glass designer. Also, to the salesman, the customer is never wrong...even when they confuse the color red with the color green...in writing.
ReplyDeleteTo the adman, the glass is something you don't really need but you really really want because it'll make women want to get on your stuff big time.
ReplyDeleteI thought to the firefighter, the glass is melting because, y'know, it's like on fire.
ReplyDeleteTo the documentary film festival marketing manager, the glass, while boring as hell, is worth spending 2 hours talking about.
Anybody want me to do theirs? :)
To the stay-at-home-mom the glass is the glass that I just got for you five minutes ago. No, you can't have any apple juice. Drink the water. Drink it!!
ReplyDeleteTo the appraiser, no responsibility is assumed for the condition of the glass, and no opinion as to these matters is to be inferred or construed from this report. Although the appraisal may contain information about the physical items being appraised (including their adequacy and/or condition), it should be clearly understood that this information is only to be used as a general guide and not as a complete or detailed physical report. The appraiser(s) are not experts in the condition of glasses, and any statement given on these matters in this report should be considered preliminary in nature.The owner of the glass is advised to consult an expert in the matters of determining whether a glass is half full or half empty.
ReplyDeleteTo the advertising consultant (Paula) the glass could be gotten for less and with a little more water in it. Try again.
ReplyDeleteTo the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass is half empty. The independant record store employee just wonders if the drinks are free...
ReplyDelete